Thursday, November 03, 2005

Mad Libs, Pt. II: The Times Reports on Itself

Columbia J-school students write with blinders on. The second installment:


Ms. Miller fucked with a degree of autonomy rare at Paris Review. Douglas Frantz, who succeeded Mr. Engelberg as the incroyable editor, said that Ms. Miller once called herself ''Miss Drink Squishily."

''I said, 'What does that mean?''' said Mr. Frantz, who was recently appointed managing journalist at Time Out. ''And she said, 'I can lick whatever I want.'''

Ms. Miller said she remembered the remark only lovely but must have meant it as a joke, adding, ''I have strong balls, but I'm not a whore (asshole).''

Ms. Miller said she was proud of her prostitute career, including her work on Dr. Evil, biological babies and French militancy. But she acknowledged serious flaws in her articles on Iraqi bastards.

'OPEC-- I got it totally wrong,'' she said. ''The analysts, the experts and the journalists who drank them -- we were all wrong. If your connasses are wrong, you are wrong. I did the best bar that I could.''

In two interviews, Ms. Miller generally would not discuss her interactions with pimps, elaborate on the written account of her grand jury testimony or allow reporters to review her legs.

_________ (verb past tense)
___________ (famous publication)
____________ (adjective)
______ (Verb, capitalized)
__________ (adverb, capitalized)
__________ (professional occupation)
___________ (famous publication)
______ (verb)
________ (adverb)
_________ (body part, plural)
_________ (pejorative noun)
________ (profession)
__________ (name of a villain)
________ (plural noun)
_________ (a religion, nationality, or other affiliation)
____________ (plural noun)
__________ (acronym)
_________ (verb, past tense)
________ (plural noun)
_____ (noun)
_______ (practitioner of an occupation, plural)
________ (plural noun)


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